i feel the earth move (tapestry #1)

i want carole king to play me like a piano. i was somewhere last night where they were raffling off a massage not from a company or anything just from some guy named michael. anyway that's what i want--a massage from some sweatpants-clad carole no-last-name. i love this song because it's like yeah you feel the earth move you're about to break your fucking hands playing the piano. downstairs neighbors banging on the ceiling with a broomstick, shit falling off the walls. of course the earth's moving.

it's a song about getting the earth-shattering hots for someone which is kinda sexy and kinda scary, one of life's greatest combos. a rigorous mating stomp that lapses into gooier and more stomachable fare before returning to the iconic fuck me chug that reeled you in in the first place. i love a song that starts with the chorus--why not? if it's the best part of the song, it's the best part of the song. towards the end there's that guitar line that almost doesn't matter. it makes the piano even better. it has something to talk over.

that fuck me chug, though. it's a cartoon character's tongue splayed across the room when somebody hot walks by. i can't believe we're all just stomping around in this erotic parade then rolling around in a bed of flowers then back out in the streets I FEEL THE EARTH MOVE. a terrifying "oh darling / I CANT STAND IT / when you look at me that way." you almost don't even hear that last bit. She Can't Stand It. we're outside with a boombox and if that doesn't work, we're going to scale the building until we can suck on the glass of your bedroom window. i don't even know the guy and now im air humping around the living room.

my mom loved carole king--a live CD called the living room tour came out when I was in sixth grade and joined her regular boombox rotation. carole came on when she was sweeping, dusting, doing laundry. these songs felt then like the fear that i might be asked to wash dishes or vacuum. i can remember hiding in my room fearing the opening applause of the intro track in spite of this being so much better than hearing kd lang's ingenue for the 400,000th time. when carole plays "i feel the earth move" live, she riffs a little on the opening melody, making us want it even more. she demands everybody clap and sing. what is the deal with this song? i didn't need to be told to clap and sing. i'm already in the streets, tipping over cars, ripping my clothes off, busting out my vacuum. making the earth move.